The spider web theory for me, is as follows.
The mind is a spider web of emotion right? So, you have a problem or something we may need to address and you go down one of the strands, siddle over to another strand and you come closer to the problem. (Core issue)
Then, you get stuck…sticky right? Yes. It is.
This is like “denial”, indecisiveness OR simply not having the appropriate methods to think something through. All the little droplets are preconceptions, emotional triggers, environmental things, upbringing, beliefs… they get in the way. Because on some level the mind protects us from the truth, which stifles growth because we can’t work on what we can’t see.
So we trail down another strand in a grand attempt to side step the issue, but we get stuck again… that could be avoidance, confusion, denial, blinders, whatever you want to call it. Because we know that we are going to continue to get stuck at various places until we address the true issue that may bother us. Course, addressing certain things comes with opening up a box in the attic that seems better off forgotten. (Which leads to personal responsibility for ourselves and our life) Then we can focus on our solutions.
If we don’t, we can end up on that strand called depression (inertia) because we’ve siddled along “so well” at this juncture all the stress of “not” dealing with this, that or the other thing is festering under the surface, and then what?
Makes the next issue/problem BIGGER than the one before! Because we never contended with what? Ourselves in a way that makes things better. Most of the time we don’t know how or we’re so buried by emotion we can’t think clearly to save our life. Which sucks. So we end up wrapped up in our own silk LOL
If you are around people who feed into the problem or talk smack and put other people down, it’s not that difficult to see how we’d remain the same. Because there’s nothing wrong with “us” now is there? Nooooo, of course not. (yah, okay)
I don’t know that I think you have to dig so deeply in personal growth that it knocks you down first. I have found that the most significant things we do sincerely start in childhood. Add all aspects of life and you have this hornets nest in your head. That’s a lot of work… I promise you it’s harder to think something through without the proper guidance and understanding than it is to learn something that will help you. No one likes to change. Rather I should say, no one likes to see that they “inadvertently” brought certain things on themselves. Most people get their needs met in a variety of ways. The questions are always is it in a healthy way or are they dragging someone else down with them.
What am I saying? Educate yourself, don’t be afraid to … grow. It may hurt for a little while or knock you on your ass, but what’s your alternative? Repeating the same patterns over and over again? Ick…